Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
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