Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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