Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
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