I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
Randomize
