she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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