In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Yeah! I was just fired because there was an over hire and the new girl is hotter than me. Seeing as how the new girl is my baby sister I think punching my manager is excusable.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Randomize
