i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
