i don't like sucking hair
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
i just woke with half a bagel saran wrapped to my phone and a cookie in an envelope beside my head...
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
You are the jesus of drinking
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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