it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Not going out tonight. And so the 25 day drinking streak ends....
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
Randomize
