Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
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