an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize
