apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
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