I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
It's rum buckets o'clock
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
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