So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize