I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Randomize
