My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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