It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm like, not good at living.
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
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