i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
After tacos, we're chasing women.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
