shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
Dude, I don't care how big her tits are. I have to dump her. She shit in my shower.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
