guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
