I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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