At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize