Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize