Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
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