so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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