I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
youre lurking in front of me
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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