if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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