he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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