i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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