I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize
