Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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