He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
