i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
