I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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