thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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