I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I see you listening to my get shitfaced playlist on spotify. glad we're on the same page tonight there's a drink waiting for you downstairs.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
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