Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
Randomize
