I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Randomize
