Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
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