just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize