she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
someone owes me an orgasm
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Randomize
