How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
