Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
