also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
We're not piercing ourselves today.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
