I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
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