I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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