U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
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