Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
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He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
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When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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