There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
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after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
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Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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