I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
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