Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
you win again, gameday.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Randomize
