it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Randomize
